Strange feeling...

Typically, to both friends and family, I'm known as the listener, advice giver, the peacemaker/-keeper, etc. But, just like everyone else, I have my soft spots, pet peeves, and once in a while, I feel as if I've bit my tongue/lip for far too long and it's about time I spout a few words of my own.

Some people I know and I make like Cheers at a local lounge. We go there about once a week to socialize, drink, eat, have a few laughs, etc. The problem I run into with some of these people is when talk politics and/or tell bad jokes. I don't mean the jokes aren't funny bad, I mean they're in very poor taste. They're either sexist, racist, or homophobic. I can typically just turn my head and block out the slurs and derogatory commentary. I've tried in my past, asking them if they wouldn't mind not saying such things around me, but it's done no good. But, this past Monday, I finally had enough.

Two televisions play at this lounge and the material shown is usually sports-related. So, there we were, watching SportsCenter and one of the two anchors was a female. So, what's my friend say, "Why's she on there? That shouldn't be allowed. He's also made comments before in regard to Hillary Clinton and why he believes she has no chance at a victory in the 2008 (or any, for that matter) presidential election. Why won't she win, so he says? No self-respecting man would vote a woman into office. That's his reason. He has similar thoughts and feelings on Barack Obama, due to his skin color. Later on Monday evening, an African-American athlete appeared on the screen and as is true about 75% of the time when his eyes meet the television screen where an African-American appears, he made some derogatory remarks. I then decided to philosophize. This guy was dead set on the athlete playing into a stereotype and not dressing respectfully, so I simply started asking, "Well, define what is dressing respecfully." He gave a very weak definition and I continued to inquire, "Alright, and why is that definition correct and another's is incorrect?" He then started saying that murderers in the video game Grand Theft Auto dress like the athlete depicted on television, to which I asked, "So, are you drawing the link that those who dress like that are more apt to murdering another than one who is not? Where are the facts to back up that claim?" He then said, "Well, he should be a good role model." I then inquired, "Define what a good role model is and why is this guy not one, according to you?" He said, "A suit, a tie, 'respectable' haircut, etc., etc., etc." I then said, "What about the many politicians who have committed crimes? Enron and other such corrupt organizations? Are they "respectable" simply because of their "professional" attire? Is one more of a role model for a child to dress "professionally," but commit felonies as opposed to one who doesn't wear "professional" attire, but doesn't commit any crime? He just kept on coming with the slurs and I finally just calmly said, "Prejudiced bast***." I think I'm done with this group of people. Perhaps my naivete got the best of me and I thought I could potentially open their minds some, but I was obviously wrong in that regard. An old friend of mine preached to me about this racist's right to free speech. Yeah, he does have that right, but I don't have to agree with it. I have just as much a right to disagree and to refuse to be affiliated with it in any way. I very much appreciate differing opinion, but don't appreciate hate. These couple people are hateful toward anyone but the heterosexual white male and while some may preach to me that it's their first amendment right to believe such things, I believe such prejudices are rooted in ignorance and insecurity.

It's just left with an odd feeling ever sense. It feels as if I've been typecasted through the years by these friends and family members of mine as the shrink and for whatever reason, I've felt a sense of guilt for actually speaking out, because it perhaps hurt another's feelings. I don't know, I keep trying to tell myself that perhaps it shook him some and he'll think twice before using derogatory language again, but call me pessimistic, I just don't see that occuring, unfortunately.