They'll be remembered for...

There are many celebrities who will be remembered for one thing. Regardless of what they do during the rest of their career, they'll be remembered for one thing and probably one thing only. This could be due to the fact that they only had one hit song or one successful flick. It also could be due to a very odd role in a film that won them praise for a short time. Following, I will list these names, what they'll be most remembered for, and give some quick advice on how they can jump-start their career again. Here are the ten I've chosen, in random order:

Macaulay Culkin- Remember this kid? He's still doing films and he's my age. But, what will he be remembered for? What else? Being the kid screaming when he got left "Home Alone." My advice to Mr. Culkin is to grow a baby face, shrink some, and be in, what is it now, "Home Alone 5?" He hasn't found success in any other flick, so he might as well go back to what works.

Haley Joel Osmont- It doesn't matter what he does from this point on, he will always be remembered for this line, "I can see dead people." Sad part is that he's been in some solid films outside of "The Sixth Sense," but whenever I see the kid, I can only think of that line. What should he do now? Grow up and see if he can pull off an Elijah Wood as opposed to the previously mentioned Culkin.

Sir Mix-A-Lot- "Baby Got Back." What other songs did this guy do? Does it even matter? That song. That video. It will always be remembered. Parents hated him. Teenagers loved him. Now, he needs to get with the times and come out with an even more controversial video, for his follow-up to "Baby Got Back," "Baby Got Chest."

Sylvester Stallone- He was a pretty popular action star a decade or so ago, but there is one line that stands out from him. It came in the "Rocky" series, when he screams out, "Yo, Adrian!" Who could forget his facial expression and just how he says those two words? What should Sly do now? Well, being his age with "Rocky VI" on the horizon? I'm sure they could think up some dandy new quotes for Stallone to say while he's boxing with a walker, a wig, and a cane.

Right Said Fred- His song, "I'm Too Sexy" was his one and only hit. There was nothing else. When did that song come out? Early '90s, I want to say? The song was a hit with the kids. If there is any form of the word "sex" in a song, they'll love it. It's like the Beavis and Butthead syndrome, "He said sex" (followed by loud laughter). So, since Mr. R.S. Fred has not had a hit in years ever since that song and who knows what he's doing now, perhaps doing construction, I say he should come out with a new version of the song. But, this time, do it for the older folks, since he's older now himself. He'll attract a new crowd, and hopefully, keep some of those loyal devoted fans who've been waiting since the early '90s for another good tune.

Jessica Simpson- Will she be a legend in music 20 years down the road? Probably not. How about an Oscar-winning actress? If "Dukes of Hazzard" was any indication of what we can expect in future films, that answer is no, as well. What I hear more than anything about Jessica Simpson is her sounding stupid, especially on she and Nick Lachey's show "Newlyweds." One thing she said when talking to Nick was, "Is this chicken, what I have, or is this fish? I know it's tuna, but it says 'Chicken by the Sea.'" Here's a short conversation Nick and Jessica had:
Nick: "Want some buffalo wings?" Jessica: "No thanks, I don't eat buffalo."
Nick: "You know, buffalo don't really have wings."
Jessica: "Yeah, I know."
Even the guys that I've talked to, who think she's extremely attractive, will comment on her not being the brightest crayon in the box. So, forget music. Forget films. Jessica should have her own talk show. Give her a dictionary, a thesaurus, and a word of the day (a very lengthy one) to use throughout the insightful counseling session. Now, there's a comedy! That or make her a permanent contestant on "Jeopardy." That'd be humorous as well.

Janet Jackson- Haven't heard from her in a while, have we? I wonder why. I remember she had quite a few hits back in the day (meaning early to mid '90s). But something happened, just two years ago. What was that? Oh, yeah, now it hit me. She was exposed to the world during the Super Bowl halftime show. That's right. You ask almost any male, "If there's one thing you would remember about Janet Jackson, what would that one thing be?" He'd break out the picture on his cell phone and say, "I'll remember that! So will all my friends. One of my friends, Bruce, got this unbelievable shot! He was there, man! Up close and personal!" To be perfectly honest, I never saw anything. What I remember are the facial expressions on both Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake's face. Justin made it look like it was a first for him. He was probably saying to himself, "Oh, they look like that?" It's unfortunate, but unless Janet does something to top this (literally impossible, it being halftime of the Super Bowl), then she will be most remembered for this (especially by males). What should she do now? She could go three different routes: 1) Run far far away, never to return to the Hollywood life, 2) Keep up the exhibition with a new series of shows or films to display to the world things that we probably already saw during the Super Bowl (but, it won't hurt her anymore than before, because, we've seen that before and on local television), or 3) Go the direct opposite route, become a nun, perhaps get a face job (follow in her brother's footsteps), so not many can recognize her, and deny that it ever happened in the first place.

Jason Alexander- Unless something truly unexpected happens in the next few years, Jason Alexander (Don't even recognize that name, do you?) will forever be remembered as George Costanza, in the series "Seinfeld." Mr. Alexander attempted to be the star of a show a year or so ago, but that flopped harder than John Goodman diving belly first into a pool. Jason has done a couple commercials here and there. He was Jack Black's buddy with a tail in the film "Shallow Hal." That's all George, excuse me, Jason will ever be. He'll be the buddy, the sidekick, the man with a tail. What I really think George, dangit, Jason, should do is to be Rogaine's lead man. His baldness was always a topic on the show, so it'd be the perfect job for Mr. ::checks above:: Alexander. Although, seeing him bald all these years, it may look weird for him to have hair. Okay, so his other option is to be a motivational speaker for bald or balding people all across the country. George/Jason did it and so can you!

Michael Richards- Here's another man that had it made on the show "Seinfeld." Remember? Yup, it's Kramer! He hasn't done much since then. Richards was in a film, "Trial and Error," that flopped. I saw it and the film wasn't horrible, but I've never felt the need to see it again, if that tells you anything. I can't see Richards finding the success he experienced on "Seinfeld," anywhere else, in the movie and television industry, anyway. When he played Kramer, he wasn't graceful (which is one reason he was so funny) and did a little modeling on the side. With that combination, Richards should definitely do some runway modeling. They'd have to air that! I mean, a runway model who stumbles regularly, makes odd facial expressions, and has an odd ball of hair on top of his head? They had a reality show on the next top model. Why not make fun of that with another show, called, "Kramer Models?"

Alicia Silverstone- Her most successful film to date is "Clueless." I can't remember the last film I saw her in, perhaps "A Blast From the Past" with Brendan Fraser. Although, after seeing that movie, I had wished I could blast to the past to stop the making of the darn thing! All-in-all, she hasn't had a very successful run at the whole acting thang (yes, I wrote thang). What will I remember most about her? Being Aerosmith's girl for some of their "Livin' On the Edge" videos. There were three, as a matter of fact: "Cryin'," "Amazing," and "Crazy." "Crazy" depicted Silverstone and Steven Tyler's daughter, Liv, doing some pole dancing amongst other "Crazy" things. That's where it all started for Silverstone, being depicted as a sexy, naughty, rebellious gal, who wasn't afraid to try anything. After those videos, came "Clueless," and pun intended, I am pretty clueless as to where she's been ever since. Now, it could work out perfectly for both parties: Aerosmith and Alicia Silverstone. Steven Tyler and the guys aren't getting any younger (to be nice) and Silverstone could use a boost in her career to attract fans once again. Silverstone and Aerosmith should reunite. It'll be a symbiotic relationship at its finest!

Others that didn't quite make the top 10, but were considered:
Paris Hilton- Her videos
O.J. Simpson- The car chase
Michael Moore- "Fahrenheit 9/11"
Keanu Reeves- Neo
Anna Kournikova- Not her tennis