Not My Usual Kind of Crowd

For some reason, my father, even though he doesn't hunt, fish, or do anything outdoors besides mow and snowblow, feels the need to hit up places like Bass Pro Shop and Cabela's, just to see what they're like and because, as he puts it, "they're like tourist attractions in some parts of the country."

We had browsed the Bass Pro Shop a few months ago. I have no idea what my father expects from these places. They sold fishing gear, hunting supplies, camouflage outfits, boating shtuff, etc. It's a store for the uber-outdoorsman. My father doesn't hunt, doesn't fish, doesn't go boating, etc. Everywhere we'd walk, there'd be someone dressed in camouflage, someone with one of those rat-tail hats, someone holding a gun. My family and I about laughed as we walked out of there, because, that's just not our kind of place. That was probably the first and last time you'll see as at the Bass Pro Shop.

So, what happens this past weekend? After lunch, my father jokingly asks (or so we thought), "Do you want to check out Cabela's?" My mom jokingly said, "Oh, yeah." She took his question in a joking manner and he took her response in a serious one, so, before we knew it, we were there and my mom said, "Oh, you were serious?" Yeah, he was. It was like déjà vu between that and the Bass Pro Shop. Kids in camouflage gear and toy guns, their fathers with matching outfits, and a guy sporting a pro-Iraqi War shirt, hat, and jacket. My father's never owned a gun, don't know that he's ever own a fishing rod, and never owned a boat. Why he feels the need to come to these places, is beyond me.

The next time he asks if we all want to go to one of those places, we'll now know to shout out the word, "NO!" Perhaps then and only then, he'll understand what we're trying to say.