Scary Technology

Technology Lets Parents Track Kids' Every Move

by Tovia Smith

Morning Edition, August 29, 2006 · For every mother who ever told her kids that she had eyes in the back of her head, modern technology can now do one better: It allows Mom and Dad to watch their kid's every move, even from across town. New gadgets can let parents know every time their children drive too fast or visit someone they shouldn't.

Mark Pawlick says he used to live in constant worry about his teenage kids -- especially his stepdaughter, Jessica.

Even at 10 years old, while growing up in a suburb north of Boston, Jessica Fairbanks was in and out of trouble. She had tried drinking and smoking, and had developed a habit of constantly lying to her parents. When it came time for her to get her driver's license, Jessica's parents were scared to death.

"We were beside ourselves," Mark Pawlick says. "There was no way I was gonna let her in the car without some way to track where she was and where she was going."

So, Mark Pawlick bought what's called a black box and hid it in Jessica's car. By using global positioning system technology to fix its location every second or so, the device is essentially an electronic tattletale. It automatically e-mails or calls Pawlick every time Jessica drives too fast, or goes somewhere she isn't supposed to.

"It was the only responsible thing we could do. We knew what we were dealing with, so we did what we had to do," Pawlick says.

Pawlick set the boundaries -- literally drawing virtual fences around the houses where Jessica isn't supposed to be hanging out, or the café where she is supposed to be working. As soon as she crosses the line, Mom and Dad know about it, and Jessica hears about it.

At first, Jessica says, she thought her parents had people spying on her. She only found out about the tracker from a friend who overheard their parents talking.

"I was … livid for the first few months," Jessica says.

But more and more teens will have to get used to the idea of "Big Mother" looking over kids' shoulders. With GPS technology getting cheaper, smaller and better, most any cell phone can be a tracking device for just a few extra dollars a month. A black box, like the one made by Alltrack that's in Jessica's car, costs a few hundred dollars, plus a monthly fee. But, it also gives parents a way to retaliate in real time.

For example, says Alltrack's Mark Allbaugh, when a teen driver is speeding, parents can remotely flash the car's light or honk the horn, until the teen slows down.

Many experts believe such tracking devices will soon be as mainstream as cell phones themselves.

"I think, over time, parents will feel if they don't have this, they're not being good parents," says Jim Katz, Director of the Rutgers University Center for Mobile Communication Studies. He says that soon, tiny cameras -- like the ones in most new cell phones -- will enable parents to literally watch over their kids 24 hours a day, seven days a week-- and even eavesdrop on their conversations. But, Katz says, all the new technology may give parents a false sense of security.

After all, the technology is not infallible, and it doesn't take kids long to figure out how to game the system. For example, if they don't want to be tracked, they can simply turn off their cell phones -- or "forget" them at a friend's home. And, a teenager can still get into trouble in someone else's car.

Psychiatrists are also weighing in on the matter, citing many reasons they think the tracking devices are a bad idea. Massachusetts General Hospital child psychiatrist Steve Shlozman says as a father, he understands parents' temptation. But, he says keeping too close an eye on kids, often backfires.

"When kids feel crowded, they tend to do things that they otherwise would not do," Shlozman says. "They take even greater risk because they have a desire to prove their independence and their individuality. There is something they need to get away with."

Shlozman says that tracking kids also undermines the trust that's critical to their development. He says kids need enough slack to learn to make good choices on their own, not just because they know Mom and Dad are watching.

"That's the moment of growth -- and you lose that if you monitor them, " Shlozman says, "They won't grow up; they'll get stuck developmentally."

But to Mark Pawlick, a tracking device is exactly what his daughter Jessica needed and deserved.

"She violated our trust and we didn't violate hers. Trust is earned, not given out," Pawlick says.

As he sees it, tracking systems can actually bolster kids' sense of independence, since Mom and Dad can monitor them from afar, instead of constantly nagging them with phone calls. Ultimately, Pawlick believes, his stepdaughter will come to appreciate what he did as a sign of how much her parents cared about keeping her safe.

Link:

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=5725196

I'm going to have to go with the psychiatrists on this one. If people, especially kids and teenagers feel too suffocated, chances are they're going to burst and do things they wouldn't ordinarily have done had it not been for the strict guidelines and in this case, spying.

This Mark Pawlick has a rather distorted sense of reality. How can tracking your kid and them knowing about it boost their sense of independence? The only time people aren't "tracked," so to speak, is at home. Teachers are always there to monitor the kids in the classroom. There are always people at work there to watch over you in one way or another. The only time one gets to have any bit of privacy whatsoever is when they're away from the classroom and the workplace.

I'm sure Mark would give me a different answer now since he has a delusional sense of how a child feels, but I can only wonder how he would've liked it back when he was a kid. I'm sure he would've loved knowing that mommy and daddy could check on him at any moment in the day or night. That would've driven me crazy (no pun intended).

I don't care how popular this gadget becomes, I'll never track my kids with it. While Mark claims this is what his daughter deserves as she's committed wrongs before, I can only wonder why she'd do such a thing. As noted above, there are ways to beat the system and the more Mark clamps down on his daughter, the more determined she'll be to do just that.

Preventing one from making decisions that could end up being a mistake is worse than actually deciding on one's own and making that mistake. How are they ever to learn if they are prevented from making decisions on their own? While one might find temporary fulfillment from copying a homework assignment, how are they ever to learn the material from that assignment if they don't actually sit down and do it for themselves? While it might temporarily satisfy Mark and his wife to put a choke collar, leash, and invisible shock fence around their daughter to protect her from herself, this will not benefit her in the long run. What are they going to do when she turns 21? Call up all the bars in the area, give them their names and numbers and to call if she's had more than one drink? What about when she turns 18? Call all the places that play keno and all stores that sell cigarettes, give them all their information and tell the place to call if they see her? Someone should track them for a week, tell them where they can and cannot go (you crossed over the line!), and see how they like it. I'm guessing not too much.

Mark, give it up man. Whatever you want to say, trust is extremely important in relationships and by tracking your daughter, there isn't going to be any gained trust, because it shows you have no trust in her. I've heard of husbands (who cheat) tracking their wives by checking their mile meter in their car because they are paranoid about their wives cheating. Yeah, sick people. Well Mark, what makes you any different?